As you read this blog, please pray for the author, Dana, as yet another publisher, #4, has fallen through the cracks for his new book. This tormented piece was written with many emotions and frustrations.
I sit in disbelief. The gentle winds feel refreshing, but the big mills of the system still exhaust my very existence. I write my memoirs I receive from heaven as I believe I’m connected to a higher power. God only anoints certain people with miracles and I know I’m one of them. Feeling like Moses, I sweat at the thought, and at times I’m in disbelief.
How do I cross many lanes of the highway’s vast interchange without being killed? The world has become a conglomerate of books and stories washed up by the beach. Crashing waters cave in!
Feeling as though I am David, standing on a hill staring at Goliath, I left my flock to conquer a monster. In the name of Jesus, God brought me thus far for purposes unknown. I trace my steps and ask the Lord, “Where are you leading me? Why are there so many roadblocks as I try to produce the gift you’ve given me? I suffer from disillusionment, yet I stay focused. I suffer financially, yet I’m a half a step from being penniless. You’ve brought me love and joy I’ve never known. But, I am lost in a maze as the haze clouds my intentions. Where am I going, Lord?”
My energies are mixed, and emotions stymie me. I’ve come to a fork in the road. What should I choose – give up on fate or follow my faith like David? It’s God I must stay centered on for answers. There has to be a purpose for Him to grant me such a miraculous gift.
Lord, I’m not a writer as most authors I know, yet millions think different. I am flawed, imperfect, and I struggle to refrain from sin too. I’m no better than the one who is reading this message. But God, you have a purpose; I am certain. How long must I wait? The tribulations seem endless. I’ll stay in prayer; not for me, but for the gift you bestowed upon me. Please, Father, guide me through these mills of the system, and protect my enthusiasm for it, too, is clouded over.
I’m at the close of another road of disappointment. I’ve turned around, though life has no reverse. God give me the strength to stare down the Goliath. Evil is everywhere! Let there be more hope than just a mustard seed in my palm. I must remember my purpose in life and conquer…. in the name of Jesus.