Returning back to my childhood home was like having a reunion with my third grade teacher – too broad to fit, and too old to try to prove I could sit. I’d rather stand anyway. Coming from a prestigious place, where the river rounds and heads north of Annapolis, I’m reminded of the lustful color, following the shoreline up the river. Memories elude to times when wishes were merely unanswered dreams. Looking back at the losses, I tried to follow my heart and only found being broke was my resolution.
So, I moved away and started again; never looking back. Life had soured within my soul. It was fruitless, as routines were commonplace and that’s the end – well not exactly. Tonight, I find myself wandering off to a place where I ask God for my restitution. He knows our debts we owe, as life’s score is 10 – 0. We ask our Lord, “Will we ever win??” I know my story is ordinary and one that many can relate to. I ask God to guide me, for I am giving up as, once again, I am the ride.
Being eternally grateful, God has proven His ever presence to me. It is a testimonial you wouldn’t believe, but, I keep my faith. God has blessed me – restitution paid! As far as ten times over, the score, now, is life and me – tied. That story is complicated, another book perhaps; as God sends me on a mission to retrieve the soul mate I never had. He knows, though, and now my life has made a one eighty. It’s not for fortune or fame, but, for the love God intends us all to have.
The key, unfortunately, is being still – reverently patient. Sometimes, the hell we go through is right here on Earth. For example, I look back at 32 years ago and I ask God, why? Looking for the purpose is one word – timing – all in God’s timing. I’m sure there’s no other answer! Faith plays a part as fate took a role thirty two years ago. It knew more than us! Today, I look back at my personal hell and realize – it’s the dues we all must pay for the reality of our own restitution…..